Not off my Antibiotics

Last night was a nice *thwack* of reality for me in class. At the foot of the master, I have been doing well -- he is breaking me of bad habits -- playing my nuanced 1950's Freudian American Realism.

And then ... *thwack!* Shaw.

Again, SHAW. My first actual duet in class was from Shaw's MISALLIANCE, at the end of which Wynn declared "THAT is how Shaw is meant to be done!" It took me about 3 rehearsals to get there, but the praise was good and the reinforcement positive.

SO ... last night. Kimberley was finding a monogue from Shaw's ANAJANSKA and she asked me to read opposite her in the scene from which she was compiling the 'logue. I was excited. I never get asked to read cold with people ... and once again, I am reminded why.

"Kimberley, I'm going to have to stop you -- this is damaging to Joe. Joe, you are not off your "antibiotics" yet and are falling into the habits I am trying to break you of, I'm sorry."

It was shaming, but good. The more and more I process the incident, the more I see what he was saying. I wasn't thinking when I picked up the scene -- just responding as I thought was appropriate. I wasn't being a character; I wasn't doing much else other than just having fun, and in the process was doing disservice to the scene, my partner, and was also falling into bad "forcing" habits. It hurt the ego, though, to be called out in front of the class -- but it was good.

To be honest, I've been getting nothing but benign praise lately and it was good to screw up and be called out in front of the few remnants of the class (it ran late and people had to leave, so only a few hearty souls remained). The praise has been lots of, "you've really found the character" and "that was well done, and appropriate for the role". Now I'm a little bruised, but its good. Sr. Geralyn told me, when I was in the 7th Grade, that I shouldn't get too "big for my britches" ... which is something I have a tendency to do from time to time. So, it was nice.

Well, not nice ... it sucked ... but its good for me. Like antibiotics.